A question to the world???

Life Perspectives:

Your take on life depends on who is in your life and what events happen in your life. You hear a lot of people saying “You changed my life.” Or “That particular incident changed their lives.”

If this is true, can you manipulate the events of your life to better fit your perspectives? 

Say I want a hallmark level of Happily Ever After. And I’ve been through numerous relationships and a divorce. Now those events changed my idea of Happily Ever After’s. Does this mean that I let those incidents and people affect my future chance of a relationship? Why do these affect my idea of relationships so much that I’m afraid to even give it a chance?? 

Now about incidents: My father passed away four months back. The business fell into my hands. Immense responsibilities, and no time to grieve the loss of the most important man in my life. Now this incident has made me very cold, in terms of addressing my feelings and dealing with this loss. Instead I’ve put those emotions into a box and locked it and thrown away the key. Now if I were to grieve,I’m considered weak. And since I’ve started going about life as best as I can, I’m now perceived as someone his death didnt affect unlike the rest of the family. 

So how best can I handle this? I honestly have no idea.. and I shall continue to search. But meanwhile Ive come up with a temporary situation. Ignore the world’s opinion and go about my business and not let anyone decide what my life journey will be. 

Day 6: Tober Sales :P

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I think all of us at some point either in our life or in our careers have dealt with people that make us go: FUCK!!!! I’M TOO SOBER FOR THIS SHIT.”

Whatever your poison is, You’d rather be high than deal with nut heads. I’ve had this thought one too many times and let me tell you.. if I had been high during any of that I might’ve been on the Most Wanted List 😛 Because let’s face it Life truly does throw you some curve balls and you aren’t always equipped to deal with it. My advice : Get someone you trust or like involved and deal with it together. And if all your tactics fail, do what the most loved red head in the world RONALD WEASLEY says: Punch him in the nose!! 😛

This one is done with Copic dual marker. I’m getting into colours I promise. I’ve just been having too much fun with my copics. 🙂

P.S: My list of Not so Sober Tales are too long to start off right now. I promise as the days go by the tales will unfold.

BE MY PERSON!

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You hear the words Support System, and you think Family first and then maybe some friends, someone you look up to. Right?? Well… I’d like to suggest another option.

YOU

I used to think I had a great support system in my family and friends. And then life dealt me my hardest cards. So confused as to what I should do.. Should I fold or keep playing this twisted game?? I turned to my family. I figured my dad should be able to help me, after all I’m his little Princess. What do I see in his eyes?? DISAPPOINTMENT, CONFUSION, BETRAYAL, CONCERN. How could I be so stupid and irresponsible enough to get into this mess?? I searched for my mom. All I see in her eyes is CONCERN, CONFUSION, STRENGTH FOR ME. I was overjoyed. But she still couldn’t show me the way. Then came the extended cousins and family. Again CONFUSION, most thought I was destined to be a fuck up and then again some couldn’t care less about me.

By now I’m too worried to even tell my friends what is happening. But I muster up the courage to do so to a few select friends. Some are CONFUSED, FaceBook says you are fine? What happened? Some say what are you going to do now? You cannot take care of yourself. And then some say well you should’ve controlled that attitude of yours. And then there were the amazing few who asked me for the first time, If I was OK? If I was going to be OK??

Through all my ordeals in my past I’ve come to filter the ones who really care about me and the ones who like me for the few minutes of my company. And the one thing that got etched into my heart and soul is.. You will always have family, friends and well wishers. You will always have someone in your corner. But none of that matters if YOU are not in your corner. See I had been looking for someone else to help me through my problems so much so that I forgot I’ve me. That I went through all of that. How can anyone else understand me as much as I do myself? Who better to give me a pep talk than the person who knows me the most? Who better to lift me up than me? The day I realised this I became my number 1 support system. Even at the end of the world, I’ll still have me. So look within you for strength, look within you for the support you seek from others. Some days will be harder than others. Your negative voice might be louder than the positive one, but know that You were born positive. So you’ve been positive more than you’ve been negative and that voice will diminish. You are stronger than your demons. Its a long process and a hard one to trust in yourself but once you do,the world will be a brighter place.

BE YOUR OWN SUPPORT SYSTEM, BE YOUR OWN PERSON. 

 

 

LGBT!!

quote13.jpgI knew about sexuality way before I probably should have. Chalk it off to curiosity or just being around a lot of information, the right and the wrong kind. I also knew that I was unsure about it. India being the ever open minded country, being gay or lesbian was frowned upon. I like men. No doubt about it. And somewhere down the line, I realized I liked women too. It wasn’t about the sex. It wasn’t about experimentation. The day i figured I might be into a woman for more than just the looks and body, was when I looked into a pair of wonderfully beautiful blue grey eyes. And I felt the same kind of butterflies I did when I had fallen in love with a guy. But my immediate reaction was, WTF just happened??  I remember calling up my friend who is a proud and bold as fuck lesbian, and rambling about this crazy feeling I’ve got about a woman. I didn’t think it could happen to me. While I’ve always thought, “A things of beauty is joy for ever!” it took me a while before I knew I like all beautiful genders. I do mean more than two because I’ve had the fortune of getting to know a Transgender lady, Ash in all her glory. I knew her when she was a man and i know her now after she transitioned. What a brave, gorgeous and strong human being she is. People think lesbians look at all woman like they want to sleep with them, or that gay men cant wait to do it with every guy they meet. What most people don’t understand is that the LGBT community falls in love just like a straight person does. You fall in love with the person, their ideals, their values, their brains and their goofiness. You do not decide when you came into this world, “Yes, I am going to be straight. I am going to marry a guy. I am going to not accept the fact that I may not be into guys. Its just a phase.” A few of my friends know am Bi- Sexual. My family does not. Probably because I knew they wouldn’t understand what being bisexual is, so I didn’t bother to tell them.My ex-husband did. He chose to ignore it like he did me. And no, he isn’t my ex because I chose a woman over him. I believed in that marriage as much as I believe in love. But somethings aren’t meant to be. Being bisexual is not a choice, its not because I want the best of both worlds. It is because I’ve seen love in the other gender too. I’ve only fell in love with a woman once, and it did not pan out to anything, but that hasn’t made me lose hope that may be my Knight in shining Armour is a gorgeous girl. I do believe in falling in love with a person. Not their gender.You cannot Pray away the Gay, You cannot keep telling yourself you are something you are not. Its not a defect. Its human to fall in love. You cannot choose who it is with. I do not hate men nor am I averse to being with a man. I enjoy it as much as I enjoy being with a woman. These shootings, these hatred spewing words you hear everywhere, is just another way to intimidate you into being someone society thinks you outta be.

You can vote, You can buy guns,

But you cannot choose who you love?

You can pierce, you can get tattooed,

But you cannot choose what you do to your body or what’s within?

This is today’s world, formed by the prejudice few,

For what do they know about love so pure. 

SO TODAY AS I PRETTY MUCH OUT MYSELF TO ANYONE WHO IS READING THIS POST, I PRAY SOMEDAY MY WONDERFUL GAY AND LESBIAN FRIENDS, GET THEIR RIGHT TO MARRY WHO THEY LOVE, TO ADOPT  A CHILD WITHOUT ANY HASSLES, & TO PROUDLY BRING UP KIDS WHO LEARN NOT TO BE HOMOPHOBIC, NOT TO SHOUT OUT RACIAL SLURS, AND TO TREAT EVERYONE THE SAME. 

And I hope someday I find someone I can love again, regardless of the gender. 

P.S.: Prayers to all the families and friends of Orlando and every other inch of this world who are fighting for their family’s right to love.

 

 

WORK BLUES !!!!

 

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Monday Blues-  Every one has had it from time to time.For me: Its a constant. I’ve seen friends who love their job, have a great passion for what they do and yet seen them crumble under corporate pressures. I’ve seen entrepreneurs fail constantly because the need to make money and be successful, trumps the joy of creating and experimenting. Our journey from Kinder garden to College, seems to be a pathway to pay bills and not discover the world we came into.

Yes- Bills need to be paid, and so yes you need a job. But you are more than that. I know its easy to say these things. Anyone who knows me, knows that I come from Money. Not much, but enough to make me take risks and go jobless for months together trying to find the right work. I know I sound like a Brat. But my reasons for it are probably not what you expect. Its not because I’m worry free because I know my parents have money. No. It is solely because I never found any job interesting and wonderful enough to stick to it. I knew as much as the world wanted me to have a steady 9 – 5  job, that wasn’t me. Every job in which I got to create, be artistically free, inspired me. And in those jobs, I learnt everything I can from it and then move on. Even if i hadn’t had money, I probably would’ve done a number of odd end jobs to pay the bills, while constantly searching for what I want.

As in love, In work, there isn’t just that one job.You can have a pick of what you want if you’ve the guts for it. So I say quit that dead end job that pays the bill but doesn’t feed your soul, work in as many different sectors as you can to find out where you fit in, and when you do, learn and accumulate as much knowledge as you can and move on to a place were you can learn more. Because your knowledge will be your saving grace at all times. You will be respected for it.

Learning never stops, until you choose to stop. Take classes, Find your passion and Don’t let the pressures of making money kill your soul. Believe in what you want to do, because a Job is just that. A Job. So the questions you need to ask yourself is, Is your current job what you want to do for the rest of your life? In the process of making money, did I lose memories? Am I doing this because I love it or because, am responsible for others and would rather kill my dreams and needs than be a disappointment?

WHATEVER YOUR ANSWERS ARE TO THIS, KNOW THAT YOU’VE THE POWER TO CHANGE IT, FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE.  IT IS YOUR DECISION TO MAKE.

On a lighter note: Do try working in smaller sectors, when you travel. My dream travel job is to be a bartender 😛 Can you believe the kind of people I would get to meet ??  🙂

CHEERS TO A GOOD WEEK OF WORK

LIVING THE LAST OF YOUR 20’s

funny_29th_birthday_gifts_heart_card-rbc8cbc22a8e3458faacb56acd8d4108b_zk9yi_324Turning 29 yesterday was a huge shift for me. Not that i felt exceptionally responsible or all the more mature. NO. It was knowing how everyone around me reacted to my last year as 20’s girl. People spoke about how I have so much to do, so little time, and how turning 30 next year will change my life forever. Wrinkles, Pressure of re-marrying, Pressure of not having kids, Career graph, the list goes on… And I was taken aback. Because though i knew a lot of these things would come up, I never thought “my time was up”. Who decides these?? Since when did turning 30 become such a big deal? Us wonderful humans live an average of say 60- 70 years, in our generation?? So technically I’ve barely lived 1/3rd of my life. I’ve so much to look forward to.  And yet society dictates my life plan for me. When did society get to decide, by 24 you finish your studies, by 27 your career path should be set, by 28 your life partner is to be decided and before you hit the oh-so-bad 30’s you have kids. And then the next how many ever years you live, you live for your kids. Where is your life? What happened to your plans as a kid to soar and just star gaze and just take the bike and ride forever?? When I asked these questions to the ones who questioned me, they said “Be Practical, Don’t Live in a Dreamworld!”

Well to them I say, SORRY WORLD, BUT AM NOT SORRY!! I’m a DreamWeaver, I’m an artist, Am a human being and a Nature lover. And “society” doesn’t have a place for me. So today, am 29 years and 1 day old, and I say, no one binds me down but my thoughts. So life dealt me a few cards. I can either fold or play on. Either way its my choice. So to all the wonderful ladies and men turning 29, you’ve been worried enough in your 20s, your 30’s are for you. So live it up. I already am. TRAVEL, FALL IN LOVE, EAT WHAT YOU WANT, BE HEALTHY SO YOU CAN DO EVERYTHING YOUR HEART DESIRES, SAVE UP FOR BIG TRIPS, SPLURGE ON THOSE CUTE BALLERINAS, WATCH SUNSETS, ADOPT AN ANIMAL, and more than any of these BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER, KNOW WHAT VIBES YOU GIVE OFF TO THE UNIVERSE, UNIVERSE GIVES IT BACK TO YOU. LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY. You may even inspire someone else to break Society’s mould and be a free spirit. So Cheers to spreading Love, Joy and Spirit to the world.

Making THE Change!!

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This year has been a turmoil. Ups and Downs and Hurdles and Smooth roads!! I guess that’s life. Without its twists and turns even the most beautiful stretch of road becomes boring to the Human Brain. But what this turmoil did to me, was it Put Me Down!! Rather I let the world around me crash and I burned with it!! At my lowest of lows I was introduced to The Secret.

Every book, from a comic to great writings, holds in it the truths of life and ways to better oneself. How and what you take from it becomes your journey.

The first lesson I learned from The Secret by Rhonda Byrne is this.

BAD THOUGHTS = BAD OUTCOME.

GOOD THOUGHTS = GOOD & GREAT OUTCOME.

And the Power to make a good outcome in your life starts and ends with you. No external entity can influence your outcome. BELIEVE with unwavering faith in your truth, in your passion and The Universe will make it happen for you. Don’t Delay and Don’t Second Guess. ACT now. For the Change begins with you and you have to make THE change.

Today with this post, I decide to take the first step towards being the best me and giving into the Universe my most positive good thoughts. I vow to Heal myself. I vow to Dance my dance, Sing my song, because No one else can live my life.

I MAKE THIS SHIFT TODAY!!